Thought construction firms would struggle to make a connection with Will and Kate’s big event? Think again - here’s our pick of the tenuous publicity stunts

A Land Far, Far Away

Well, the West Midlands – but still arguably a bit of a trek from the capital. This is where a local housebuilder recommends Will and Kate should reside in one of their houses to get the best deal on their first marital home. According to David Wilson Mercia, the happy couple would pay less in monthly repayments on a mortgage of up to £145,000 than renting, as they plan to do, in a cottage near William’s RAF base in Anglesey. “I have no doubt that it would be cheaper for Prince William to buy a house from us than to continue living in rented accommodation,” says Rita Tyler, sales manager at David Wilson Mercia.

Canopies or canapés?

The safety-conscious ECA has issued a set of comprehensive guidelines for those holding street parties, doing its bit to avoid the country spontaneously combusting come Friday morning. It is particularly concerned over the forecast of bad weather – reminding the public that “water and electricity do not mix”. Its number 1 tip (of 10) is to protect your TV from sudden showers “with a gazebo or canopy”. However, don’t get carried away with the prospect – this is only to give you enough time to turn it off at the power socket before it actually comes into contact with some of that treacherous water. The ECA is very clear on the dangers of placing too much faith in your posh tent: “It would not be safe to watch the wedding on a television under a gazebo in the rain.” You have been warned.

Let them eat cake

Retirement home specialist McCarthy & Stone is hoping to lure the over-60s away from preparing their gazebo-protected televisions and towards its Cheshire developments, promising a celebratory glass of champagne and slice of cake to all visitors in the three days leading up to the Wedding. Visitors will also receive a limited edition £5 coin, which presumably they can choose to put towards the property of their choice. And you might even make a friend: “Being able to celebrate such a momentous occasion together will only strengthen the great sense of community here,” enthuses sales and marketing director Fiona Brooks.

Princess and the Tea

In honour of the royal nuptials, Miller Homes is offering house hunters the chance to live like a King (or Queen) for a weekend in London which will include afternoon tea at the Ritz and a night in a luxury hotel for two. The offer is open to anyone who registers with Miller Homes online before the wedding so hurry up – you’ve only got until 11am tomorrow morning to be in with a chance!

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